Wednesday, December 4, 2013


A rutabaga is a relative to the turnip. It's quite tasty, eaten raw. Cooked as a vegetable it is very pungent. In a vegetable-based soup, it is almost essential.   

The rutabaga is much denser and much larger than the average turnip. The one in the picture is about 4 inches diameter.  Slice it any way you want - the inside is uniform, with no grain or any other distinguishing characteristics.  Chop a rutabaga into cubes, and the cubes from the center will be exactly the same color, texture, and flavor as the cubes from near the surface. There is nothing going on inside a rutabaga. You start digging into a rutabaga, and there are no surprises, no core, no pit, nothing - it's rutabaga all the way down.

This homogeneous property - the dense uniformity, no matter how deep you go - doesn't that remind you of the look you get when you ask for something at Home Depot? Or Wal-Mart, or Best Buy, for that matter.  The blank, purely stupid look. That look that will not change no matter what question you ask. When you gaze into the blank eyes of a rutabaga, you are not going to get an answer, no matter what question you ask.  "I'm looking for Wire Nuts" - "You want wire?"  "No, Wire Nuts"   "Oh, nuts and bolts are over in the hardware section  - ask in Aisle 12. Is there anything else I can help you with?"   And then, back to texting on his cellphone.   Completely uniformly blank and stupid. Rutabaga.  I don't see how some kids can maintain such perfectly uniform stupidity and continue to live.

This blank powerful look is so powerful, that it can be felt over the phone.  Give us a ring at our call center.  

Thanks for listening and contributing. I'd love to hear from you.

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