Wednesday, September 29, 2010

God Stopped By Last Night

Early morning. Tucked behind the iron mailbox at our front door, was a small folded piece of paper. A note from one of the tenants? Package attempted delivery? No, this came from "higher up".

Drat! God had been there once again in the middle of the night, and we missed him again! Why doesn't He knock, like in the picture? Behold, He stands at the Door and knocks. No, God had an important message for us, but He couldn't be bothered with telling us personally. He gets in these "Hate and Run" moods, sometimes, then He just leaves a note.

"God left a note again, last night."

"Again? and He didn't knock! We would have heard him. What is it this time? Is He hating on the gays again?"

"No, this time, I think He's got us!"

In the past, God had been castigating us for things we didn't do. Abortions, homosexuality - Even though the things He was angry about were things we hadn't done, He had wanted us to persecute people who were exercising their choices for reproductive freedom or choice of life-partner. But this time...

"It's the martinis that are setting Him off, now."

I showed my wife the paper which Hate-and-Run God had left us. That relaxing moment of twinkling ice at the end of a 12-hour-plus day was what He was now after.

"Did He say why? Remember, His Kid used to turn water into wine a few years back. Did He forget that? Where does He get off prying a martini out of my hand?"

"Apparently - He quotes the prophet Habakkuk --"

"Ha-WHAT?"

"Habakkuk - Old Testament Prophet. Remember - Nahum Habakkuk Zephaniah Haggai or something like that. Habakkuk said - here let me quote - 'Woe unto him that giveth his neighbor drink, and makest him drunken also, that thou may look on their nakedness.'"

"Go on, does God really think we're doing that sort of thing? I'd like to see you even try looking on your neighbor's nakedness. I'd give you such a one...."

"Well, next time He comes over, I hope we hear him. We could ask Him in for a martini."

Thanks for listening and contributing.

1 comment:

Lydia said...

BAAHAHHA - hate and run!

We don't get delivery. Apparently God only does take out in Texas :)